1. Uni: “This is a book about a made-up place called ‘Romania’ that is led by a murderous dictator and his wife, a fake doctor, who stock their mansion full of fruits and vegetables and meat while all the other poor ‘Romanians’ starve and have nothing better to do than gossip about their neighbors and go to prison camps. Meanwhile a British guy bumbles into the middle of things and starts having sex with the non-evil daughter of a semi-evil politician, and befriends some people who end up not being his friends, because as they say ‘things are not what they seem in Romania.’ After we finished this one we asked Scott what made him different than a fictional Communist dictator with a silly and unpronounceable name—after all, he decides what and when we eat, when we’re to have our pelts dredged by the Furminator, how often we can sit in the window watching Landis’s pigeons loop around the building, etc. Scott got a sort of confused-slash-guilty look on his face, a pretty common expression for him really, and then he did that thing where he strokes our noses until we pretty much fall asleep like legit narcoleptics, even though we’re not tired.”